by Laura Giddings
| Trust. Now there’s a loaded word. Without it, relationships falter, and teams have a hard time getting work done. But what is it, exactly, and how is it built? Does it just happen over time by itself, or is it something carefully nurtured – and easily damaged? About 10 years ago, I picked up a book called The Speed of Trust, by Stephen M.R. Covey. He suggests that there are five waves of trust, accompanied by five attributes:Trust in Self (credibility with yourself)Relationship Trust (consistent behaviors with others that increase trust)Organizational Trust (alignment of internal structures to promote trust within)Market Trust (reputation of the organization in the wider community)Societal Trust (contribution of the organization to society) For a long time, I couldn’t get past the first 125 pages of the book, which focus on building trust in self. I recognized that I had work to do to become the person I wanted to be and to do the work I wanted to do in the world. But I couldn’t change anything without increasing my credibility with myself. By doing that work, however incompletely and imperfectly, I have found what Covey says to be true: Every time we make or keep a commitment to ourselves – large or small – we increase our self-confidence. We build our reserves. We enlarge our capacity to make and keep greater commitments, both to ourselves and to others. The Speed of Trust, p. 67. Covey also advises that we choose these commitments to ourselves wisely: by not making too many or making them too quickly, by treating these commitments with respect, and by thinking through how you will respond when keeping that commitment becomes hard. On your Lenten journey, what one commitment could you make to yourself to increase your self-trust? How might increasing your credibility with yourself affect your trust in others? And if you want to borrow the book, I’d be happy to lend it. I’ve got both the Kindle and the paper versions. As we dig deep together we ask: For the courage to show up, Patience for the journey, Trust in the darkness, Celebration in the light, and compassion for ourselves and one another. |
